I believe one of the greatest advantages you can give your child is to determine your perspective on autism and how it will relate to your child.  You love your child more than anything and you would do anything to help them to be happy and healthy.

We all want the same for our children - if we are good people.  We want them to grow up safe and surrounded by love, acceptance and achieve a level of whatever 'success' means to each person. 

When a parent receives a diagnosis of Autism, they may feel in some way this universal goal for their child can no longer be achieved.  We simply know that is not true.  Children who have Autism can not only experience happy lives, they can be highly successful adults.  There is however an environmental factor - YOU.  As their parent, you are their model, their guide, their strength.  If you raise them to first see their limitations, they will learn to feel limited.  If you teach them a successful attitude, they will adopt an attitude of success.

All parents are helping to form and shape their children into the adults they will become.  As a parent of a child with Autism, your challenges might be a little greater - but so are the rewards.

The dictionary terms to define 'perspective' range from 'mental view or outlook' to 'the ability to perceive things in their actual interrelation or comparative importance."  They are both appropriate. 

Will you allow your child to be defined by their autism or is it just a part of them? 
Do you accept that you have a child with autism or are you still seeking new diagnoses and 'cures' hoping there has been an error in their evaluation process?  Hope is not a bad thing - it will keep you going, but you must also live in the right now and allow your child to experience complete acceptance of who they are now, looking to all they can become.

Your perspective on autism and how it will relate to your child will determine everything from the medical treatment they receive to the way in which they think you view them. Attitude should never be underestimated, especially in parents of children with special needs.

Denial comes in many forms.  It can be the parent who is not willing to admit in any way that their child has autism.  It is the parent who claims to accept the diagnosis and does little or the parent that nervously tries every new treatment that comes along, dragging their child through all kinds of unpleasant experiences.

For the child whose parent is not willing to accept their diagnosis, it may also be interpreted as an unwillingness to also accept the child.  I am convinced that children of all developmental abilities can sense if they are loved and accepted as they are or if there is a condition involved.  Some parents do not tell their child they have Autism because there is no need, it is a condition they have, not who they are.  There comes a time as they mature when they must be told in the simplest, kindest terms, about Autism.  They may demand a reason for why they must have OT each week or ST.  If you prepare them with correct, but positive definitions, they can digest them and share them with curious friends, classmates and family members.  This gives them the power to determine what they have before someone bullies them or teases them about Autism in a hurtful way that damages their self-image.

Autistic children are some of the most genuinely sweet children you will ever meet.  For some it may mean getting past the sensory issues such as tactile defensiveness, but inside, most do not seem to have the ability to be genuinely hurtful, maybe this has something to do with the 'theory of mind' that they feel everyone sees the world exactly as them.  Having said that, I think they are able to experience deep emotions like us all, and also interpret a lack of acceptance of who they are.

For children with social 'quirks' which make them often stand out, there is a great deal of acceptance and love required daily to reach a level of comfort with this world we insist they must be part of, and conform at least somewhat to.

When you hear the words, "your child has Autism," your world may seem to stand still for a while.  You may get angry at God, punch the wall or ask "why me?"  Although they are all understandable responses, they will not help your child and since Autism is a life long disorder for most children, you must take on the positive mind that your child can be their own success story and whatever that may mean to him or her.

Attitude is everything and while your child may have autism, this is not WHO they are.
Labels are better on soup cans than children and we should use labels only for service purposes.  I encourage you to truly view your child as unlimited in possibilities, for the self-fulfilling prophecy works both positive and negative - what we believe we become.

Your child is already very fortunate - you have taken the first steps to awareness and education, and that is definitely a positive step in the right direction. Allow your child to become that unlimited possibility.